Grace for the Good Girl

G.R.A.C.E.

I think this must be my theme for 2012.  In everything I am reading and learning, God has been revealing to me His grace in a very real and personal way.  Having been a child of God for most of my life, you would think I would have a complete understanding of this word.  I am so thankful for the recent reminders that all of life is grace, not just something extended to us at the point of salvation.  I need grace each moment of my life and He lavishly pours it out on me.  I regret the years I have lived taking for granted His outpouring of daily grace.  I am learning and growing in a much deeper understanding of His grace recently and it has been such a blessing!

While on bed rest in January, my sister-in-law recommended to me a book by Emily Freeman, Grace for the Good Girl:  Letting go of the Try-hard Life  WOW, what a great book!  I could totally relate to the good girl label.  After all, I am the missionary and pastor's wife, right?  Freeman reveals how as women we can easily mask our true selves behind this persona of what others expect us to be or of what we want them to think of us.  How when we do that we are not free as we should be in Christ.

I think having the profile of the pastor's wife sets me specifically up to come across as being put together, always the giver of encouragement, wise council etc. -- when in reality I feel anything but that most of the time.  I did not realize the deep rooted problems this can cause in being able to relate to others and more importantly living freely as to who I am in Christ.  At one point in our ministry, Jonathan admitted to being tired and was rebuked by a national partner.  That experience has only driven me to convey that everything is always fine, but it has really inhibited us to feel free to be honest and open in relationships. I want to strip those masks that I have put on without even realizing it.  I want to be free to expose the messy, so that others may see HIS grace and not me and my efforts.  I told Jonathan this book was just "hitting me while I was down", while physically weak, God used this book to convict and encourage me.  So glad I read it and for the hope found in the truths of God's word and the focus on grace that Emily so well communicated to the reader.

The first section of the book, "The Hiding", talks about the different types of masks we wear. Masks of responsibility, strength, spiritual disciplines, acts of service and good performance, always showing that everything is fine etc. The second section of the book, "The Finding", delves into what it looks like to find ourselves in Christ - when we take off our masks and rest in Him. The third section talks about the freedom of being found in Christ. Of being safe in His arms, even when life hurts.  Each of us are able to live loving God and receiving God's love and not constantly hiding behind the "good girl" mask.

After each chapter there are reflection/discussion questions.  At the end there is a study guide for small groups.  This would be a great book for such a setting.

I was deeply challenged by this book and have been blessed also by Emily's blog, Chatting at the Sky.  This will have to be a book I reread in a couple of months.  There has been so much I have been trying to process and realize that as I write this post about a book I read a month ago, I am already in need of a refresher!

P.S. If you follow the above link to the book, it is currently on sale for $5.  A super great deal--so go get it ladies!!

Samuel's 9th Birthday

Our final year of single digit children has begun.  *Sniff sniff*  Samuel could not have been more excited for his birthday!  All week he was giving us play-by-play accounts of "this is my last ___ of being 8".  He had his day all planned out down to the time he would wake up.  He told us he was going to sleep in until 9:00AM so that we could get everything ready for his birthday.  Haha, not sure what he was expecting, but hopefully he was not dissapointed.  We told him he didn't need to have each minute of the day planned out and that he should just enjoy it as the day unfolds.  (He woke up at 7AM, by the way).  Yesterday he officially told Emma: "You may have my #8 now that I am 9".

Samuel, you are one sentimental boy!  So sweet and appreciative for all the little details of life.  You are a true joy to us and make our family so special.  You have grown by leaps and bounds this past year and are no longer our "little boy", but a young man.  God is working in your heart and giving you such compassion for others, a desire to know truth and seek that in God's word, a desire to do all things well and an increased level of perseverance.  You are our little budding musician, scientist and theologian.  We love your continuous stream of questions and pray they never stop.  We wish you the best year of life yet, and can't wait to walk another year of life with you.  

Yesterday we had a leisurely morning and then opened up presents before heading out for the afternoon. He loved all of his gifts and his dream came true of having his own microscope.  I didn't realize he had that dream, so kuddos to Papa and Nano for helping him realize his dreams.  He loves science and now we ALL will get educated on random science facts in microbiology.  Seriously, I learn so much from this kid!  Luca and Emma made very special cards for Samuel.  Emma also made him a stuffed mouse and paper top.  I love to see their love for each other expressed in their own little ways.  He also received books, DVDs and legos.

We went out for lunch and then went to the theater to see "The Muppets".  It was a fun afternoon and we all enjoyed the movie.  So nice to not have Luca getting bored because of the language issue, thus making our theater viewing more enjoyable.  We came home to a house filled with the aroma of marvelous meatballs in the crockpot per Samuel's request.  He had several phone calls, enjoyed his dinner and then ended his special day with the Star Wars Millenium Falcon Cake.  He said it was the best birthday ever.  Mission accomplished!

Thank you so much everyone for your sweet cards, e-mails, gifts and phone calls.  You ALL were a part of making this Samuel's best birthday ever!  We love you!

More Snow Fun

The snow has kept coming down for the most part of the week.  Today is supposed to be the final day though.  They should have cancelled school today as the roads were really bad since late afternoon yesterday.  Jonathan was slipping and sliding on the road coming home from the kids' piano lessons last night.  He had to cancel English and nearly everyone texted him back saying "good call".  More than half of the kids were absent from school today.  And from what we gathered from our kids, they didn't do much of any work so as not to leave their absent classmates behind.  We kept Luca home this morning, which made his day.  Since school is half day on Thursdays, the kids were excited to get back out and play in the snow again.

iPod Playlist

Apart from Jonathan's current album, "All Good Things Are Broken" there has been one other on my iPod repeat playlist.  It is the current album, "Every Falling Tear" by Matt Hammitt.  It has been on continuous stream for us since we discovered the CD a week ago.  Each song has ministered to us in a special way, and it is rare that one CD can do that.  A timely, God-sent musical blessing to us this week.  Here are two of my favorites: